Recently, a friend and I decided we would each try to read a book that would inspire conversations regarding our individual journeys with a fellow named God and then meet up once a week to discus our wandering thoughts. This is quite a challenge because we are both in the PT program and barely have enough time to get through assigned readings for class, let alone read additional book(s). Regardless, we thought it was an important endeavor to tackle, so here we go! I chose to reread a book by one of my favorite authors, Donald Miller called Searching for God Knows What.
I am sure I will have a few blogs in the future about this book and my conversations with my dear friend, but today I wanted to just reflect on what is has been like to find my "sea legs" again after spending a fair amount of time wandering away from my devotion to God (and I think it is quite important to mention I have a relationship with God, not a religion). There are many reasons why that is an important statement, but the most important reason I believe it to be important is because my relationship with God HAS to be dynamic, or else I am just a member of a crowd following blindly because someone else told me God was a good guy.
And it is this dynamic relationship that has left me absolutely dumbfounded because God has a way of doing things that I do not always understand.
I am not unique in the ups and downs I have experienced in my relationship with God. In high school, I was enthralled with what it meant to seek after Him and honor His life by mimicking my own after His. That was all well and good until I went to college and had to sort through the vast amount of "religion" and apologetics to find truth. It was in college that I decided to make my relationship with God... personal.
And that is where I am today... still trying to be fully committed to this dynamic relationship. It is not easy. It requires commitment and devotion, neither of which I am particularly good at. I decided to join a home group within the church I have been attending and I am excited to meet people outside of my program as well as spend intentional time each week in conversation regarding this dynamic relationship.
Until next time...
3 comments:
That is my fav Donald book. But I just started reading A Million Miles in a Thousand Years. I'll keep you updated :)
Awesome book! I do not know how you are finding time to read during school.
Jyndia~ I first read this post a few days ago. I've come back and reread it, and come back and reread it again...and again. It is amazing how it resonates with me right now. I've been trying to figure out what to/how to respond. Not only to let you know that I love it-where you are, where you are headed, but also, it is good for me to "lay it out on the line," myself. I have had and continue to have a relationship with God. I have also seen that relationship change/morph/grow as days, months, years pass. I remember a time when I was shy and timid about my faith, to a time that I whole-heartedly embraced it, to a time that I just needed to figure it all out in my brain and in my heart. How I wanted to live to glorify God. And what that meant to me. I, too, have felt a pull towards DM. I recently found myself sitting cross legged on the floor of a bookstore rereading (for like the millionth time) the Author's Note for "Through Painted Deserts," in the company of an amazing Christian woman who is years younger than me in age, years older than me in faith. I felt at that moment; amidst the feel of comforting and meaningful words, the sound of bookstore silence, the smell of old books and the horrible flourescence of old building lighting; at home, at peace, but also unsettled as I have felt the need to become more in tune with God and where He lands in my life. Where I let Him land in my life. I decided a long time ago that my faith can't fit in a box. It shouldn't be crammed in, shouldn't look like everyone else's, it should be and feel like mine. It is a dynamic relationship. It also takes time, and permission on our part, to allow ourselves the freedom of having a relationship with God in the form it takes. The way we most feel comfortable with. Whether that be reading daily devotionals, attending weekly church services, Bible studies, home churches. Whether it be in a half hour meditation, reading a book that makes us think, feel and evaluate what is in our hearts. As long as we are talking to God, stengthening our relationship with Him, that is what matters. I think in this age of religions and churches and the politics that come into play, that is a challenge. It sometimes is hard to say that we are Christian, have a realtionship with God, but don't fall neatly into what some believe that should look like. I give you kudos for challenging yourself with making that relationship...personal.... dynamic...meaningful to you. Many blessings to you on your journey and wherever it may lead. (sorry for the book...)
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